I have decided to write to you, since whenever you are in front of me; I can never seem to hate you. It’s only after you are gone, that I realize how bad you are to me…how bad you are “for” me. I can’t explain the transition that takes place, from the love and gratitude when you are around to the guilt, regret and uneasiness when you are not there.
I have given you up too many times to care…and each time when you come back; I can do nothing else but to take you in and hate myself for doing that.
Like that time, when I told you: you are no longer a part of my life…but 3 hours later, like a weakling I called you back! It’s not fair that you are around whenever I need you, whenever I crave for you…
I realize that I love you and hate you and love to hate you… I also realize that you will be my downfall, my disease, my relief.
If only I could give you up, Junk Food; If only!