Holding On To Goodbye

No substituting your warm voice and touch
a whole life of weaving magic undone
in one cold whisper of wind, all of it ceased-
the retorts, the epigrams, the yarns
customized for each friend, those you loved nearest
whose eyes now spill shine, like the diamonds you deserve.
The soft faces are pale, the long sighs like the songs you strummed,
the phone toyed with, willing for it to ring,
and your jokes over the phone, to come to life
like my memories just now…
of all you were, all you promised to be,
taken in one swift act of indifference.
Who will do it again? Mix friendship and love
in such a concoction that it is hard to identify if it were
platonic or not, harder to resist, yet.
Who will do it again? Take my hand and hold it tight
when in fear, when letting go is easier?
That’s just it: no one. And I can’t do it either,
for anyone else but you.
I’m holding on to Goodbye.

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